Her New Friend

I promised in my last post that I'd write about our adventure last week. We started out slowly and quietly; the two of us naked and embracing under the covers, our legs intertwined, our hands caressing each other and our lips gently locking and releasing in short and erotic cycles. Our warm-up session displayed the deep love we have and served as a beautiful segue from the activity we'd been doing just prior.

We moved on to more heated and intimate activities, but without the toys and props, at least initially.  We arranged ourselves into a few different positions, both of us playing the role of giver and receiver.  One of my lady's favorite positions is when she lies on her back and I kneel next to her.  She is able take part of my cock in her mouth, which she really enjoys, and I can caress her pussy with my fingers.  She gets very wet and engorged when aroused and she loves how I touch her.  I love this position as well, for all the same reasons.  Then, I had an idea.

I excused myself from our arrangement and retrieved the 7.5" realistic dildo that readers will have met a few stories back.  I said, "I brought your new friend out to play."  She smiled.  I placed it at her lips, and she sucked on it for a bit to make it wet. The fact of the matter is, she really didn't need to make it wet, but I thought it'd be fun to offer it to her. It was a turn-on watching her do that, and I'm fairly sure she liked it too.  

Resuming my prior position, she took my cock back in her mouth and I proceeded to rub her new friend over her pussy, and then I pushed it slowly inside her. I worked it gradually and carefully, trying to ensure her wetness lubricated the whole shaft as it penetrated further. Once it was all the way in, I started repeatedly thrusting it into her, gauging her reaction, looking to ensure that it was comfortable and maximized her pleasure.  From her ministrations on my cock and her verbal cues, I'd say I was succeeding.

The only thing about the position we were in is that it's a bit tough on my back and legs, and after a while I felt like I had to change.  We moved into a sixty-nine, with her on top (always).  I brought her new friend to the entrance of her vagina, and while licking her clitoris started to push it back in. The dildo was a little dry, and so I did the logical thing.  I took the head of it into my mouth and got it nice and wet.  I was able to slide it right inside her.  

I have to say, that in many years of reading sex stories, viewing images, and fantasizing about various acts, one that had turned me on more than once was the position in which we were situated; a sixty-nine, with her taking a cock in her pussy and me getting a close-up view while sucking on her clitoris.  Nevermind that this cock was fake; it was real enough for me in this instance, and it really turned me on.  I'm quite confident that it turned her on as well.  I worked the cock vigorously into her while enveloping her clitoris with my lips and gently flicking it with my tongue.  Once I pulled it too far out and it hit me on the face. I opened my mouth and sucked her juices from it, then put it back in. She tastes so good. I felt so submissive and turned-on at that moment, I'd have done anything to please her.

When she came, it was a big one. It went on for a good while as I watched her spasm, squeezing the cock, and I continued to stimulate her orally.  I didn't orgasm that day.  I don't think I should refer to mine as a climax.  I think that her orgasms are our climax because of how much we both love it when she comes.  Mine should be called something else, maybe an aftershock. It's just not as important to me. My lady, my love, my everything feels differently. She wants me to have orgasms. She's happy in a similar way when she makes me cum as I am in the reverse. 

I do of course enjoy my orgasms. I would also be happy to cum if for no other reason than she wants me too.  It's just sometimes, I can't get my head in the right space, and the orgasm eludes me.  Early in our relationship, my inability to climax weighed on both of us. She felt as though it was her fault, somehow. Only through extensive conversation and reassurances has she come to realize that it's all in my head, and it's ok if I don't come.  She has, on occasion, told me that I'm not permitted to come during our lovemaking. That's a headrush for me.  She's also instructed me to be sure and save myself for her by not cumming during the week, even if I masturbate.  I like that she's dabbling with controlling my orgasms. I don't want it to be a burden for her, but I really like abstaining at her behest. 

Thanks for reading.

Jen

My Darkest Fears

 "Fear keeps us focused on the past or worried about the future. If we can acknowledge our fear, we can realize that right now we are okay. Right now, today, we are still alive, and our bodies are working marvelously. Our eyes can still see the beautiful sky. Our ears can still hear the voices of our loved ones."

--Thich Nhat Hanh

Something has been gnawing at me for quite some time.  It was difficult to put a finger on it.  I've been having difficulty sleeping for quite a while.  As the Howard Hamlin character from Better Call Saul states, I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.

In a word, I think the culprit has been fear.  Also known as worry.  I've been worrying about a lot of things lately.  I'm dealing with a very-pressure job, and there are a lot of changes coming in my life soon. I'm getting married, moving house, and also probably retiring soon.  Each of those is a known stress-inducer by itself; collectively they are daunting. I have always had a tendency to fret over my past and worry about my future. I know that living in the moment is important. I've tried mediation in the past, and may do so again.

Perhaps my biggest fear has been whether I'm good enough for my lady.  I know that she loves me, deeply.  She says it and shows it in so many ways. I love her orders of magnitude more deeply than I thought possible.  There's just a part of me that thinks I'm undeserving of love, inculcated over the years by abusive siblings, a long-lasting but utterly failed marriage, and probably some amount of inherent nature.  My fear, as expressed by that bastard of an inner voice, was that if she really knew me at the deepest layer, she would not feel the same way about me.  That one day, she'd announced that she just can't be with me.  

So, what would be the causal factor in said break-up?  Me. As in Jennifer. The name I've given to my crossdressing self. It seems that women that are not absolutely repulsed by men who crossdress are rarer than a unicorn in a tutu.  Of that number, woman who are accepting of such behavior are a mere sliver of a fraction.  What are the chances that my lady occupies that rarified space?

Well, as it turns out, the answer is 100%. We had a long, tear-filled conversation yesterday about this blog.  As you know from prior posts, I invited her to read it.  She was hesitant; not sure what surprises it might hold. I reassured her that I had no more "big reveal" moments; that she knows about all my "quirks."  Still, I express thoughts here with more detail and clarity than I can provide in conversation.  I think deeply about things, and conversations usually move too fast for me to fully express myself properly.  I invited her to this blog so that she could read my thoughts in detail. I don't want to hold secrets. I want her to truly know me.  My fear was, that once she did...

I need not have.  I received this text from her last night, after she left..  "Well, I read everything.  I love you more than ever.  Fear not. You are *still* my everything."

There are things left to explore. But they are within the territory already staked out. She truly does love "all of me."  I am over the moon.

By the way, we also had a pretty amazing love-making session this weekend. That deserves its own post; hopefully soon.

Thanks for reading.

Jen

Blog Readers

My lady asked me last week to send her the link to some blogs, so that she could learn more about what turns me on.  Have I mentioned how amazing she is?

I thought about several that I follow, but I didn't really feel like any one in particular was a good example, by itself, of the things that interest me.  While each is appealing to a degree (why else would I follow them?), they are not completely in line with what I like. Some focus entirely on aspects that only mildly interest me, and some include topics as a minor element that don't appeal to me at all.  Others are so "out there" that I follow them out of fascination rather than similarity to my interests. 

I had been thinking the whole time that my own blog - this one - is the one that I should share. My primary hesitancy was whether knowing that she was going to read it would change what I write.  The answer is, probably so. But that's ok. It could be better than ok.

I sent her the invitation. I hope she likes what she reads.  I'll let you know.

Thanks for reading.

Jen

A New Metal Device

I've been wanting to try a metal cock cage for quite a while. I hear positive reviews of Mature Metal's devices, but am not quite ready to spend that amount of money, only to find out that metal doesn't suite me.  I found this one recently and ordered it:

Lock the Cock / Rings of Abstinence

It arrived yesterday, and I immediately washed and put it on.  When my lady arrived for dinner, I showed it to her.  She's concerned that it's too small, because my cock was pretty well filling it up. I told her that's because of the circumstance, me standing naked in front of her, she holding my cock and balls in her hand. Yeah, that sort of makes me aroused.  :-) 

First impressions:

1. Quality. You get what you pay for.  I know that.  The finish is ok, but not well polished. Still, I think it'll be good enough to experiment with, which was my objective.
2. Weight. Obviously, metal is going to be heavier.  This one has fairly thick pieces, so I think it's heavier than it probably needs to be.
3. It's trickier to put on than the Holy Trainer.  You have to be careful not to pinch your skin in between the metal stabilizer pins and their holes. Ouch!
4. It's also a bit harder to slide into. I use a bit of hand lotion, and my HT pretty much goes right on.  This, because of its open spaces, take a little more manipulation
5. Size. I got the largest ring, and that part feels ok. The cage itself only comes in one diameter, and it is a bit small for me.

I wore it for several hours last evening, and there are no indications of irritation.  I'm going to wear it for a longer period today and see how it does.

Thanks for reading.

Jen

Jennifer Sort of Makes an Appearance

I slept at my lady's house over the weekend. It was after our little adventure that I described in my last post.  After she left to tend to things at her house, I started taking care of my tasks at my own place before heading over. As I prepared to go, I decided to wear only ladies' clothing.  Ladies' collared shirt (buttons on the other side), panties (all I wear, anyway), jeans, socks and sneakers.  All the externals would pass without a second glance in public 99% of the time. I know, because I frequently dress that way when I go out to run errands.  I don't look feminine, mind you.  No make-up, wig, or jewelry, just a guy proving that hardly anyone looks closely at you anymore. They're all pre-occupied with their phones.  

Anyway, I decided to be bold, and brought only a chemise, panties and a ladies short grey robe for the morning.  The chemise is my nicest one, and my lady has seen it before,  It's from Macy's, the Jenni brand. I don't think they sell that particular style anymore, but I found this image of it.

I didn't sleep well, so I went to her guest bedroom to finish out the night. I awoke later than her, and boldly donned the chemise, panties and robe, and padded into the kitchen to kiss her good morning and have coffee.  

Let me just say, she's amazing. We hugged and kissed, and sat down to enjoy our coffee.  I looked at her, bared my shoulder to show the strap and said something like, 

I thought I'd wear this, is that ok?

I noticed it when you first came down. Yes, it's ok.  Does it make you feel good?

Yes, it does. 

My eyes welled up.  She saw that, stood, came over and hugged me. She said,

I love all of  you.  I want you to be happy.

I kissed her, and I cried.  For years, I've been guilt-ridden by my longing for woman's clothes, and femininity in general. I've lost so much - a marriage, friends, family.  And here is this woman.  This amazing, beautiful, intelligent, strong, caring, loving woman who loves all of me.

I cannot yet fathom the fortune that has come to me. It's difficult to even write about it without welling up.

Thanks for reading.

Jen

P.S. I just realized that the name my favorite outfit by Jenni is so similar to my nom de plume.  It's either coincidence or some deeper connection that I'd not noticed before.  It can also be seen in my icon.

Triple Penetration

We had another awesome weekend. The vanilla side was filled with love, laughter, family and birthday celebrations. We shopped and cooked and ate meals together. Spending time with my lady is what I live for, no matter what we do.  She feels the same way.  We never knew love could be like this. 

On the kinkier side, and since that's the point of this blog, we had an amazing weekend on that front as well.  We started out more traditionally, without any special equipment.  The bondage straps were affixed to the bed just in case she wanted to tie me down, but we ended up not using them.  She wore a simple but beautiful bra and panty set, both pieces of which were open (what do you call a "crotch-less bra"?).  I had quick and easy access to her beautiful lady parts. She gets very aroused with nipple play, and I do love to kiss and suck on them, both for the selfish pleasure I get and for the stimulation it brings her.  She became very wet and proceeded to lower herself onto my mouth shortly after hearing me beg for it.  I'm so easily controlled...  :-)

Our session continued in various permutations of oral and PIV activities, leading up to something that I'd promised her earlier in the week. My lady wants to have anal sex. For reasons I don't fully understand, I've been a bit less eager to penetrate her that way than I should be.  I think it's mostly because it feels like a dominant act on my part, which is out of character.  But I told myself that she wants it, and I want to please her, and so I will do it for her.  That's being a good submissive, right?

I asked her if she was ready, and she told me to get the "pink thing," a small dildo around five inches long, and not too thick.  It's obviously phallic-shaped, but otherwise it looks nothing like a real cock.  It's a good start. Before going off to gear up, I used a finger, and then two in order to loosen her up a bit.  I then inserted a well-lubricated glass plug.  I strapped the pink one on, just above my actual cock. I also brought out the realistic-looking cock we'd used last week. I had an idea.

I slowly pulled the glass out and confirmed that she was ready. With her on all fours and me behind, we worked together to place and slowly penetrate her bottom.  She took it quite well, with little discomfort. After confirming that it felt good, I started thrusting slowly, gently.  She loved it.  Surprisingly, I did as well. This position isn't super comfortable for me, but the act of taking her backdoor with a strap-on was really stimulating for me.  My cock was also looking for some action, so I suggested we try double penetration.  It was a bit of an assembly challenge, getting flaps A and B into slots 1 and 2, but we managed.  Here it helped to have a longer than average cock, because the angle and distance were not optimal. We made it work.  

Wow, it was spectacular for both of us.  To throw gas on the fire, I handed her the other dildo, and asked her to suck it.  There she was, the love of my life, penetrated in her three openings. The visual image, physical stimulation, and psychological impact on me was intense.  I had to stop moving. 

What's wrong?

Nothing, I'm close, and I don't want to come yet.  I want you to come first.

I want you to come.  I'll use it to lubricate myself.

I came.  Hard.  Really hard. We switched positions, me on the bottom, the pink one going back into her ass.  I watched her bring herself to climax while I stimulated her nipples. She radiates when she comes. There's no better sight than watching her orgasm.

We cuddled.  Exchanged tender kisses.  A song came on, and we sang it to each other.  How sweet it is to be loved by you.  Sweet indeed.  Lovely, fun, fulfilling, erotic. She penetrates my core.  We love each other beyond description.

I have another story from the weekend, but it deserves its own post.  I'll try to write it soon.

Thanks for reading.

Jen

A Double Barrel, of Sorts

This weekend, my lady and I had a new adventure.  We'd been busy all week (as usual), and really motivated to have some good quality time together.  She whispered in my ear on Friday, "you'd better rest up tonight, because I have big plans for you tomorrow."  I did not need to hear that twice.  On Saturday morning, I received further instructions, and taking the initiative to fulfill the explicit ones, but also carry out the spirit of her commands, I proceeded to the bedroom.  

I cleansed myself inside and out, and I took a razor to my entire body.  The only hair I have is on my eyebrows (trimmed) and head (short); I am bare everywhere else.  Post shower, I inserted the largest of my butt plugs, locked myself in my pink Holy Trainer, and wore a pair of pink Vanity Fair Illumination bikini panties.  She loves me in pink, what can I say?  I fastened the bondage straps near the head and foot of the bed, and placed the cuffs on my ankle and wrists.  I then padded downstairs to fetch two wine glasses and a bottle of Pinot Noir, as per her instruction.  

As she announced via text her impending arrival, I finished the preparation with a surprise for her, sliding a dildo harness on, and then latching my ankles and one wrist to the straps.  Oh, the harness held a life-like cock, one of those double-silicone types that is firm but flexible, the same length as mine, and almost as large around. I'm happily endowed with a cock one may not normally associate with a submissive, feminine-feeling and crossdressing sissy. But there you have it. I am as I am, and I try not to bother pondering why.  I pulled the sheet over my body, placed a blindfold over my eyes, and waited.  

I heard her arrive, and ascend the stairs.  Pulling back the covers, she touched the cock (I could feel it move against the harness). "My, my, what have we here," she declared. I said to her, "if you're not comfortable with this, we don't have to have it." Well, trust me, she was comfortable with it.  She removed my blindfold, revealing a sexy lavender teddy that showed off her beautiful, womanly curves. She rubbed her moist pussy and traced her finger across my lips.  She then started stroking the cock. She kissed the head of the cock, and then started sucking on it, locking eyes with me as she did. I was watching her suck cock, right where my cock usually is, but I couldn't feel it (of course). 

The mixed messages that my brain tried to reconcile sent me into a sexual frenzy. It was one of the most erotic events I've ever seen.  What I felt was a combination of excitement from multiple fantasies rolled into one: chastity, submission, feminization, cuckolding.  My actual cock was straining to break free of its confines, but that would have to wait. She moved up and sat on my mouth, so that I could savor her taste, see how wet she was, and feel her magnificently engorged clitoris on my lips and tongue. I could worship her pussy for hours, but alas I was only permitted a minute or two. She then moved down and rubbed the cock all over her pussy, getting it wet. I watched in awe and excitement as she took her new friend into her pussy, as our eyes stayed locked on each other. She rode the cock, and presented her beautiful nipples for me to worship. I met her movements with thrusts of my own, again with my brain expecting but not receiving the normal coordinated signals from my several senses. 

She could have come that way. She got close, and it didn't take long. But she didn't want to. We had a lot of time and a lot more fun to have. She did eventually free my various parts from their various restraints, and we concluded the session quite satisfactorily for both of us.  

We cuddled, cooed, and dozed afterward, having re-expressed our deep and abiding love for each other.  This magical moment was made possible by love, trust, communication, and adventurous spirit.  She is awesome, and I love her more every day. Not just for what I write about here, but for a long, long list of other reasons.  I am very fortunate.

Thanks for reading.

Jen  

She Said It

Several weeks ago, I gave my lady one of the two keys to my Pink HT.  I keep the other are my key ring.  Last week, I bought her a silver chain so she could wear the key between her breasts. It's something we both find erotic. She wore it to her workplace, tucked inside her top, but the chain was visible around her neck, and it drew more interest from her co-workers than she anticipated.  One of them asked probing questions.  Did (my name) give it to you?  What's on it?  Do you have a vile of his blood on it?  My lady said she turned red, further raising suspicions. We had a good laugh about it. I got to thinking that if she decided to disclose the actual purpose of the chain, I would be ok with that. Obviously, she has to work with these ladies, so such a decision is hers. I doubt she will but I guess we'll see.

As to wearing the device, I'm using it to help myself not masturbate. I truly want to save myself for times with her. A few weeks ago, I let us both down by masturbating during the week, and my performance with her the next time we made love was disappointing for both of us. I am determined to not let that happen again.  I want to give over control and decisions about my orgasms to her, but at the same time I don't want to burden her with that responsibility. We'll go at her pace and to the depth of control she wants to exert.  

I can wear the device all day at home and while out and about without issue. I don't wear it to work though, just because urinating would require sitting in a toilet stall. They aren't clean enough for my liking in normal times, but in COVID-19 times it's just not something I want to deal with. I've tried wearing it over night, and while it's doable, it does disrupt my sleep. I already don't sleep particularly well, so that's kind of an issue. In any case, the HT is indeed helping me control my masturbation, even with the limited use I've explained.

On Friday, we made love in the afternoon. My son announced he was going to visit for the weekend, so we took advantage of the free time we had before he arrived. My lady texted me that she was ready and had the key with her. Unfortunately, technology intervened, and I didn't get the text notification. She arrived and was sort of pretend angry that I'd not responded, and was not ready for her. I quickly remedied the situation, took a quick shower and we proceeded with the festivities. 

There is no greater sexual pleasure for me than orally pleasing my lady. I could do it every day for hours, methinks. She also likes to perform oral on me, and it feels wonderful. Our favorite position is 69, with her on top, controlling the action. She'll come that way every time, unless she stops me so that she can orgasm with me inside her, again, with her on top (noticing a theme, here?)  She came in my mouth this time, and it was glorious. Watching her spasm, tasting her, hearing her climax is awesome. 

My lady always comes first, for simple and obvious reasons. Whether I come at all is an open question.  Sometimes, I just can't quite get there. The center of my sexuality is my brain, not my penis, and if my mind isn't in the right place, no amount of physical stimulus will overcome that. The length of time between my orgasms is also a key factor. Yesterday, I was quite ready, and she commented on how hard I was. Indeed.  After her climax, she'll often ride me for a while, still obtaining pleasure, although her particular lady parts are quite sensitive post-orgasm.  After that, she'll lie on her back and we'll do missionary position. That's normally how I come. 

This time, while I was inside her and thrusting vigorously, she whispered to me, "you're not allowed to come today."  That made me get even harder, and my thrusts got more vigorous. "Ok," was all I could muster in response.  "Yes, my lady," or some such reply would have been more suitable. I did manage to say, "I'll continue for as long as you like, and then I'll stop."  So, that's what we did. I kept at it for a good while longer, both for her pleasure and to further the tease for me.  Then, she signaled it was time. I rolled off.  She took me in her mouth for a minute or so, and then she laid down next to me.  We cuddled, and expressed our deep mutual love for each other, as my erection receded gradually. The rest of the evening was tender and wonderful. We worked together in the kitchen making dinner, hugging and kissing along the way, and we had a splendid time with my son and his girlfriend.

I don't know when I'm going to be permitted to come. I suspect it will be today, if we can find the time to be together.  If not, I suppose it will be a long week.

Thanks for reading.

Jen

Getting Comfortable with the Cage

Last weekend, my lady gave me the following instructions (paraphrased due only to my imperfect memory).  "When I come over later today, I want you on the bed, wearing only your  pink panties, and your pink chastity cage.  I'm going to tie you down and do things to you."  I didn't need to hear that twice!

Have I mentioned how amazing she is? There was no room for question in her directive, and none in my mind. In fact, I not only fully complied with her instructions, I made some reasonable extrapolations.  

I began by showering and shaved everywhere. I keep my body hair free; done so for years. I've never been hairy in any case, so it's not difficult.  Other than what little remains on top of my head, and my eyebrows, both of which are kept short, I'm bare.  The intimate and feminine act of shaving my legs, genitals, chest, arms and arm pits remains a turn-on for me, even after all these years. After we met, I was a bit concerned with how she might feel about my smoothness. It turns out that she keeps herself entirely follicle-free as well, save for her beautiful, flowing mane and sculpted and sexy eyebrows, and she finds me quite sexy, thank you very much!  She also was a bit concerned with my opinion of her bare nether region, and of course she is the sexiest woman on Earth so far as I'm concerned, so it was a very pleasant surprise and another area of personal overlap when we revealed our mutual preference.

After shaving, I locked myself in my pink Holy Trainer.  I also inserted a "prostate milking tool" butt plug that I bought from HT when I bought the cage.  It takes a bit of practice to insert due to it's shape, but once settled in, it feels nice.  I've never actually tried to milk myself with it, but it definitely adds to my submissive feelings.  Lastly, I put on my pink panties. These are actually designed for men, and are one of the few panties that I wear that are.

When she texted that she was on her way, I pulled the covers off the bed, revealing the straps that I'd secured earlier.  I put cuffs on my extremities, and fastened my ankles to the bed.  When she came into the house, I put on a blindfold and secured my left wrist tot he strap.  My lady was quite pleased with my compliance to her commands. and appreciated the extra distance I went.  She quickly clipped my right wrist into place.  The feeling of giving up control to the woman you love and trust completely is divine.

We've talked a lot about this journey that we're on.  She's told me how safe and comfortable she feels around me, and around the things we do. As a result, she's feeling more and more emboldened. As her confidence grows, so does her sexiness, which I hadn't thought possible, given how sexy she already is.  She made some approving comments, and traced the outline of my cage, through the panties.  This was my our first time with her seeing me actually wearing the device, and her coos and quiet whispers made quite clear that she approved. She then described the outfit she wore, which the blindfold prevented me from enjoying, at least for the moment.  Well, she didn't really explain very much, but I heard a zipper, and then I felt her move her body over mine, and I was soon tasting her.  She was very wet and engorged. There is nothing, nada, zilch, nil, that I love more than orally pleasing her. I could do it for hours, every day. Alas this time was short, because she wanted me unlocked (not unbound though), so she got the key and almost immediately I was at full mast and ready to go.  Physically, we fit together as perfectly, as we do emotionally, intellectually, ethically, and in every other aspect of our lives. We both prefer her on top, where she can control the action, and I can use my fingers to pinch or my mouth to suckle her very responsive nipples. Our play continued for quite a while. I am sure that I've never been harder, nor more turned on than I was that day.  I don't imagine she was either, given the physical evidence, aural indications, and rapturous climax she experienced, which was followed shortly thereafter by my own. 

I never knew what love was until I met my lady.  I love her on every level, and I am grateful for whatever happenstance aligned our lives so that we could meet. Our sex lives are but one aspect of how we express our love.  

Our journey continues.

Thanks for reading.

Jen

An Amusing Ride

It's been a while since I posted, and there have been some developments.

First off, the relationship with my lady just keeps getting better.  We bond on so many levels, and have such a great time together, doing everything. I like to go with her when she shops, or runs errands. She's sort of blown away by that, because her ex never did that. He reportedly whined and complained any time he had to do things she wanted or needed to do. His loss, my gain. 

We recently spent a week together in a small, rented apartment on a beach vacation. I think we were not more than a few meters apart the entire time, except for a brief trip I took to the market for a baguette one morning. We were also naked a lot. It was awesome. At the end, all we wanted to do was be together more. That will come soon, when we marry and I move into her house. Between then and now there are some logistical challenges to work out.

Ok, on to the kinky stuff...

My lady mentioned in some conversation a month or so ago something about chastity.  It might have been an article she'd read - she's studying up on kink, because, having come from a marriage where even oral was considered weird, she's got some catching up to do. I casually stated that I have a cage. She seemed a little surprised, but not much. I told her I'd show her some time. I'm trying to be careful not to pressure her into a situation that makes her uncomfortable. There are several reasons for that.

The primary reason is that I love her, deeply. I want her to be happy. To me that means that she is comfortable, and that we do things that she enjoys.  The second reason, not independent of the first, I suppose, is that I've learned (the hard way) that trying to do too much or go too fast is a sure way to failure. That said, maybe it sounds like I'm "topping from the bottom."  I think about that a lot. I'm trying not to. I'm focusing on making her happy, every day, in every way that I can. Nothing is better for me than seeing her happy.

As an example, the other day, I used the analogy of an amusement park with her. I said, "let's say I like amusement parks a lot, and that I like to go there often.  The parks are only so much fun when you are alone, and pretty soon, I start to find it less appealing. But then I take you to the park, and we go on some rides. The joy that I find in the park visit with you is mostly from seeing how happy being there makes you."  I don't want to take my lady on the craziest rides, I want to take her on the rides she wants to go on. If we never do all the rides, I don't care. If we do, it'll be because she discovered them and wanted to ride them. She might even want to go on rides that I don't like, but I'd do it because I love her, and I trust her. 

So, back to the cage, a few weeks passed, and we were making love. As is always my objective, her pleasure came first, and I was now heading towards mine. There was a bit of a delay in my climaxing, which is not unusual for me.  No issues with erections, but sometimes the climax eludes me.  She whispered in my ear, "you'd better enjoy this now, because afterward, I'm going to lock you up."  Schwing!!!  I climaxed a few seconds later.  In the afterglow, I told her, "I believe you've begun to understand my wiring diagram."  I brought the cage out so she could see it.  She played around with it, seeing how it goes together. A smile came over her face. I am amazed at her. We are way past any prior experiences I've had involving women in my kink. This is so fun.

Things went even further this past weekend.  I'll write about it soon.

Thanks for reading,

Jen