Tonight we talked about humiliation. My lady has made it clear that a hard limit for her is that she will not do anything that causes her to lose respect for me, or to humiliate me. I am in complete alignment with that. The most important aspect of our relationship is our mutual love and respect for each other. My lady is my everything, and I am hers. Our time in the bedroom (or elsewhere) is one facet that, however magnificent (and oh, is it ever!), does not outshine all the other aspects of our life together.
It got me thinking about what, exactly, humiliation is. Yeah, there's the Webster's definition. That's all well and good. However, I think she said it better already. If she "forced" me to do something that caused her to lose respect for me, that would be humiliating. We would both hate that. It would affect our whole relationship. I've read stories about Dommes who put their subs through all sorts of paces, for the sole purpose of laughing at them or denigrating them. That won't float either of our boats. In fact, I believe we'd take on water at an alarming pace.
I am not in a position, nor of any mind to pass judgement on what works for others, although I do find myself hoping for a happy, healthy psychological ending for some of the folks whose stories I've read.
When we started the conversation, my lady assumed I was referring specifically to the instance in which she inadvertently released some piss into my mouth when I was worshipping her pussy. I did not find that the least bit humiliating, for the simple reason that she didn't do it to belittle me. Also, I liked it. A lot. I'd like to do it again. Whether we do, or experiment in other ways, time will tell. The litmus test remains, are we doing this out of love and respect in addition to a sense of adventure? If the answer is yes, then it is not humiliating, regardless of the activity.
Thanks for reading.